GMO OMG

Plan "B" here... stricken with a bout of food poisoning.  It's not a fun experience but I'm trying to look at it in a positive way!  For instance, I look at the constant diarrhea attacks as a good way to shed a few of those unwanted pounds!  Plus, the powerful blasts of deuce give me a great opportunity to really work my abs!  Summers right around the corner gang!

I recently downloaded Netflix on to my playstation3 and I have to say I'm pretty disappointed with the results.  Granted it's a free trial but the movie selection is horrible!  It's basically a list of crappy movies I've either seen or decided not to see.  I mean, in the new arrivals section they got movies like Basic Instinct 2 and Passenger 57.  Really?  This is what you're calling a 'new arrival'??

 "Always bet on black"

As a result of such a shitty movie selection I was forced to investigate the documentary section.  This turned out to be a fantastic twist of fate because I watched a variety of compelling documentaries on some important topics....or at least I think so. 

One of the first documentaries I watched was a film called "Tapped".  "Tapped" is a movie about the dangers of bottled water and not tapping dat ass.  The film gives a behind the scenes look at the bottled water industry.  The film had such a profound effect on me I decided that I would boycott all bottled water (as best I could) from here on out!   The next day I went out and got a BPA free plastic water jug!  BPA stand for Bisphenol A, which is a deadly cancer causing toxin in plastic that seeps into bottled water among other things.  It's been 2 weeeks and I haven't had a sip of any bottled water!  That may not seem like a big deal to any of you but I'm proud of it!  It's like my way of resisting the new world order.  Whenever I speak about politics and the new world order people always ask me "well, what are you doing about it??" Well, this is me doing something about it!  It may be futile but at least I'm doing something.  The fuck you doing?????????

Another documentary I watched was about the food industry business called "Food INC".  At first it started off like any other 'where your food comes from' movie.... chicken coups n slaughter house type shit.   Then things got interesting when the film started to go into genetically modified foods and a company called Monsanto.  Owww, Monsanto!!  Ya see, back in the 80's Monsanto was the first company to genetically modify seeds (soybean, corn, wheat, etc.).  Many farmers began to plant the GM seeds because they were resistant to certain pesticides and were supposed to 'yield' better crops.  During this time Monsanto also filed a patent on these GM seeds.  The law basically says that if a farmer uses any of Monsanto's GM seeds then Monsanto is entitled to all of the farmers 'yield'.  

For example! 

Lets say Plan B owns a farm.  And on this farm he had some crops (E-I-E-I-O) and all of his crops came from natural seeds.   Now, the guy who lives across the street from me is a farmer too, except he's planting GM seeds from Monsanto.  "Good luck neighbor!" Then, one windy night some of the Monsanto seeds accidentally blow across the street and into my soil.  The crops grow and nobody can even tell the difference, that is until Monsanto's goon squad shows up to tests the crops.  Even if 1% of my crops is determined to come from a Monsanto seed I own them, under law, all my crops!!   WTF??

These dudes are ruthless! When it comes to Monsanto its either get down or lay down!  You either buy seeds directly from them or they'll sue you and drive you out of business through a series of long legal battles.  And the best part!  You have to buy seeds from them annually because you're not allowed to keep any of the GM seeds for replanting. That way farmers have to keep coming back to Monsanto year after year after year!  Good for Monsanto, bad for American farmers.  

I encourage readers to check out these 2 documentaries and do some research on both subjects.  Bottled water and Monsanto.  and when ya do tell em Plan "B" sent chya!!  (Large Marg laugh)

TWITTER!!!

YO IM ON TWITTER NOW!  FOLLOW ME FOR MEANINGLESS UPDATES ABOUT SHIT NOBODY CARES ABOUT!!   THEREALPLANBEE

#Winning

DOUBLE FEATURE BLOG!!!!

man, I must really have nothing to do today!

While on my relaxing vacation I made it a point to stay as disconnected from 24 hour cable news as possible. For me, watching 24 hr cable news channels angry's up the blood!  I needed a break from the constant bombardment of NWO propaganda, it was really stressing me out! And for the most part I stayed true to my oath of no cable news. 

Enter Charlie Sheen.

The only time I watched the news during my vacation was to see/hear the latest Charlie Sheen rant, which turned out to be a daily thing, so I guess I watched a lot of cable news now that I think of it.  Shit. Of course the interview that set off this whole media fire storm was on the Alex Jones Show!  Shout out Infowars.com!!!   

Say what you want about Charlie Sheen, but you gotta admit dude's been KILLING IT in all these interviews!  He single handedly spawned like, 5 catch-phrases in the course of a week causing social networking sites to explode.  I mean, you literally can't walk down the street without someone yelling out "Winning!" It's hysterical but very close to becoming played out. 

The mainstream media is a truly disgusting entity.  While the Charlie Sheen story is very entertaining, there's more important stories that they should be covering.   The only thing the mainstream media loves more then a celebrity meltdown is a political sex scandal.  Clearly they have high journalistic standards. I watch these TV goons and they all say how they're going to 'pray' for him because they really care for his well being.  They say they'll 'pray' for him but they never tell what they're praying for exactly.  Are you praying that he stays sober and reconnects with his family?  Or are you praying that he keeps shooting off at the mouth and keeps the media circus running so you can milk it for ratings???? Hmmm.  All these fake journalists sit on tv judging him for the lifestyle he's living, degrading him every chance they get, at the same time promoting they're own Charlie Sheen interview.  Hypocritical much???  TV news people are so dooshy!

I've always been a fan of Charlie Sheen's work.  More so in the movies rather then TV.  Wasn't really into 2 1/2 Men but he definitely made that show into what it was.  He turned their tin cans in to gold!   Plan "B" supports Charlie Sheen and his crazy rants. You can consider me to be in Sheen's-Korner as long as he continues to stand up to mainstream media and fights against Hollywood's hypocrisy.

Here's Plan "Bs" Top 5 Favorite Charlie Sheen Movies:

1) Major League- Rick Vaughan 

2) Wall Street - Bud Fox

3) Hot Shot 1 n Deux - Topper Harley 

4) Cadance - he was the white prisoner w the black prisoners

5) Men at Work - Carl the garbage man

Honorable Mention:

Platoon - too depressing for me

Red Dawn

Lucas

Feel me up before you go-go

Hello friends!

Plan "B" here after a MUCH needed extended vacation.  I spent the last 2 weeks staying with a friend in an undisclosed tropical locale.  It was awesome, the weather was perfect.  I was kicking at the beach everyday, loving every minute of it.  Matter of fact, I want you all to address me as Plan Beach from now on...meh, nevermind that, Plan "B" works fine.  Anyways, it felt really good to get out of NY.   Turns out, I was really stressed!  I guess fighting the new world order on a daily basis can really wear a man out...I can only imagine how people on the REAL front lines feel.  Shout out to them!

Lets talk airport security! The last time I was on a airplane was 2007, so I was really anxious to get a first had look at how intrusive the airport security had really become.  My primary concern was the body scanners.  Were they using them?  Would I have to go through one?  Did I have to balls to 'opt-out'? I flew out of JFK and was relieved to find that they were NOT using the back scatter body scanners, unfortunately, the undisclosed airport I flew back from DID use them.

SIDE NOTE: The weird thing about the body scanners is that they are called "Rapiscans" that's the actual name of them!  I always thought people were calling them Rapescans because they were so intrusive but that's their names.  I thought that was funny and ironic.  

The undisclosed airport had 4 security lanes open, 2 of which were using the body scanners.  I mistakenly ended up in the body scanner line because it was the shortest line of the 4 but I quickly got off the line when I realized what was going on.  There was no need for me to 'opt out', but I would have!  As I left the body scanner line for the normal metal detector line I heard a TSA agent announce that "all passengers with infants and baby strollers must go through gate 1".  Gate 1 was the body scanner line! WTF!?!?!  I didn't see any babies go through the scanner and I'm glad I didn't because I probably would have caused scene and end up getting myself arrested.

Man, fuck the TSA!  Maybe it's just me but they gave me a really creepy vibe at both airports I flew out of.  None of the agents were friendly, they were all sloppy looking people with bad attitudes who could barley speak English.  Real prize winners!   When I asked an agent about the possibility of walking through a body scanner machine the bitch looked at me like I was crazy.  I felt like slapping that stupid look off her face.  "you know, those illegal naked body scanners that shoot people with deadly x-rays, ever heard of em before Pilar???"  OWNED!

My feelings about the TSA screening process being a complete waste of time were confirmed when I witnessed the public groping of an 85 year old grandmother.  She was probably picked at random for a pat-down but really??  How fucking stupid is that??  God forbid the TSA profile terrorist and criminals!!  RACISTS!!!!!!!!   This poor woman was giving an extremely embarrassing pat-down in front of everyone at the security check point.  They made her lift her shirt half way up, exposing her flabby old belly.  They felt up on her boobies.  They got all up in her crotchal region.  They stuck their hands INSIDE her pants before finally giving her the "OK" to go.  I just shook my head in disgust as I walked away.

I'm all for airport safety but these security measures need to be re-evaluated.  The TSA is like the airport gestapo running around in their ugly dark blue uniforms and I'm not down with it at all!!!    

Hmmm

Thoughts from the War Room

2011 is starting out to be a pretty awesome year!  Hundreds of birds falling out of the sky, thousands of fish turning up dead in rivers, psycho-loner shootings, major snow storms blanketing most the nation, gigantic cyclones crashing into Australia and massive public uprisings against oppressive governments. And that's just January!

For the past few days I've been hunkered down in my War Room, monitoring the news and keeping a close eye on the situation over in Egypt.  The weather really sucks! 

Btw, War Room is code for "parents basement" : (

Man, I love a good uprising. The footage of these riots is amazing! People are running around all wild and crazy, throwing rocks and hurling molotov cocktails. Screaming and chanting going on, dudes are breaking windows and burning shit. There's random gun fire. It all makes for some pretty good TV.  I especially love watching these dummy news reporters getting their asses kicked when they try to report from inside some unruly crowd.  These people have no food, no job and live off $2 a day, they don't give a fuck about no Anderson Cooper.  Is it too late to send Sean Hannity over there??

Plan "B" fully supports the people of Egypt and their rioting ways.  Seeing oppressed people rise up and fight against their government makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.  Power to the people!  What troubles me is that social unrest is becoming a common trend in many countries across the globe and could be heading our way.  I'd be down to riot for a few different causes. You know, anti-NWO shit or some UFO disclosure just to name a few.  When I say I'm down to riot, I mean I'd attend to a riot. I'm not trying to be the dude on the front line breaking the law but i'll be the dude 50 people back cheering that guy on!  "Yea! Burn that fucker down!!!  Yo, kick that window bro! kick that shit!!! Kick it!! Yeaaaaa!"   I just wanna be a mob guy that's all.

What would it take for you to riot????  What an interesting question!

During the riots in Cairo, the Egyptian government shut down the Internet as a way to curb protesters from gathering.  That only made the people madder.  That would make me mad too!  I love the Internet! Here in America, senators are working on legislation that would give the President power to shut down the Internet.  A so-called Internet "kill switch".   Of course, it would only be used in the event of a national emergency blah blah blah blah.

I think people would riot if the government shut down the Internet in America.  Yea, you wouldn't be able to communicate.  Yea, you couldn't get any information. Yea, yea, yea. None of that matters.  Do you know how many people are addicted to Internet porn?? I'm not sure of the exact number but I can assure you it's a lot!  These aren't the type of people you want to agitate either.  They're already on the edge. Theres a thin line that keeps single, lonely men from plunging into the deep abyss of insanity and that thin line is Internet porn.  Take that away and you'll have chaos.  If a man can't bust a nut he's gonna find another way to release his tension.  9 times out of 10 that means something is gonna get fucked up.

People in America need to start rioting over shit. We need to start flipping cars.  The world is spinning out of control and its like nobody can be bothered.  OH, SORRY TO INTERRUPT YOU DURING TEEN MOM YOU WASTE OF LIFE!! The Egyptian youth population is leading political protests to change their government.  China's youth is number 1 in reading, math and science.  What's Americas youth good at?? Text messaging??  Cyber bullying other kids to the point of suicide??   American kids are a bunch of uninformed, ignorant, over sexed, over privileged, drugged out, wimps!   Time to step our game up America.   

2010 Year in Review

Hey gang!  This is gonna be the final blog post of 2010!  Don't worry, Plan "B" will "B" back in the new year with plenty of hard hitting blogs that'll warm your heart and stimulate your mind!

Now that 2010 is almost over, lets do a the PLAN "B" YEAR IN REVIEW!

THE BLOG:

I think it's been a pretty good year for the Plan "B" blogspot!  We picked up a lot of new readers. We put out a lot of thought provoking material mixed in with some hilarious comedic commentary and we caused a lot of controversy.  Remember the 'playing with fiya' video I put out???  That was pretty cool right??   I know I promised to put out more videos but....you know how that goes...   I think the addition of the Plan "B" fish tank was a major success!  If you don't wanna read the blogs at least feed the fish.  Oh! Oh! Oh! Remember my battle against the Craig Kilborn show???  That was a big hit over the summer.  FYI Kilborn has not been seen or heard from since!  Boom!  The best/most important thing about the blogspot is the participation of the readers!  I enjoy hearing what my readers think about certain topics and I love to see the vote counter go higher and higher.  Stay engaged and always voice your opinion, it makes things more fun for everyone!  Maybe I'll come back with a new layout in 2011???  Ya never knowwwwwww....

COMEDY:

For me, 2010 was a year riddled in unemployment, credit card debit, suicidal talk, video games, physical fitness and hand fucking.   It's scary how accurate that sentence is.  Unfortunately as the year progressed I found myself doing less and less comedy.  From January til about July I was HOT on the open mic scene, getting up a lot and doing well but then things just kind of stopped.  Issues in my personal life were beating me down and my desire to get on stage dwindled.  It got to the point where comedy was costing me more then it was giving me.  I went from being a comedic rebel to being a rebel without a joke.  Being a comedian is like being a drug addict, I may give it up here and there from time to time but the shit keeps calling me and calling me and calling me (Pookie: New Jack City)

5 FAVORITES OF 2010:

1) Antoine Dodson, "Bed Intruder Song":  This might be the funniest thing I've seen in 2010.  Only in a sick society like ours can a candid interview about a potential rape be transformed into a hilariously catchy tune! "Homeboy, Homeboy, Ho-Ho-Home Boy!"  You can't help but sing it!  The beat is hot and Antoine Dodson nails the flamboyant ghetto dweller stereotype perfectly! What more could you ask for??? The video currently got 58 million views on youtube! Thats ridiculous!

2) Inception: This was by far the hottest movie to come out in 2010.  I saw it in the theater twice and 3 times on dvd, it's pretty complicated so you're gonna need multiple watches to really appreciate it.  The combination of Christopher Nolan and Leonardo Dicaprio is gold if you ask me and that's exactly what you get when you see this flick.

3) Call of Duty: Black Ops:  I'm a big call of duty fan and was excited for the release of Black Ops.  It's the highest selling video game in history raking in  $1 Billion!  Super Mario can get the ballzack! All C.O.D games are fun to play but I personally like the Modern Warfare games a little better.... not to say that Black Ops isnt fresh, its a really good game and fun!  I'm currently ranked at a 45 and my go to gun right now is the AK47 with dual mags, semtex, a claymore and nerve gas.  WHAT!

4) Golf:  Plan "B" is big into golf!  I played a lot of golf in 2010 and really stepped my game up.  My final round of the season I shot a personal best of 85!  I'll be looking to shoot in the 80's consistently in 2011 so watch out!  During the course of the golfing season I played at 8 different courses throughout NY.  Golf isn't cheap but if you pay with a credit card you can trick yourself into thinking it was free, at least that's what I do.

5) Chocolate Cherrios:  People are raving about the Ipad being the best invention of 2010 but my vote goes to Chocolate Cherrios.  A new twist on an old favorite, Chocolate Cherrios dominated my mornings for months.  A hearty bowl of chocolate cherrios is a great way to start your day but this cereal is more then just a morning delight, it can also be used to curb those late night cravings as well.   Talk about versatility!  2010 saw an explosion of multi-flavored cherrios but the Chocolate ones were hands down the best.

5 THINGS IN 2010 I DIDNT GIVE A SHIT ABOUT:

1) The Chilean Miners:  I didn't give a fuck about these morons trapped in a hole.  It's pretty much a given that miners are gonna get trapped underground, yet for some reason this was a big deal.  People were treating these guys like they discovered the cure for AIDS while they were down there.  I think it's a bigger story if a group of miner's doesn't get trapped underground.

2) The World Cup:  ZZZZZZZZ!  oh, Angola is playing Norway?!?  ZZZZZZZZ!  I loved seeing all of these people on facebook pretending to be 'into' soccer w their gay status updates.  Gimme a break!  All that did was prove to me that there's a lot of dick riding trend whores out there.  See you hardcore soccer fans in another 4 years.

3) Jersey Shore:  I'm amazed at the number of adults who watch this show.  I get why kids would watch this train wreck but to see grown men talking about 'GTL' makes me wanna puke! At first the show was meant to mock the type of people who went to the Jersey Shore, now it idolizes it.   If you think watching a bunch of grease balls get drunk and trade STD's is good TV then you're a MORON!

4) Brett Farvre : This guy must have some very incriminating pictures of the person who runs ESPN because he's constantly being talked about.  I'm tired of hearing about this prick!  Is he playing?? Is he retiring?? He's retired!  He's back!  He's texting pics of his cock!  WHO CARES!  Every sunday I pray for him to die...on or off the field, doesn't matter.

5) Royal Wedding:  This is America buddy! I don't give a good god damn about no stuffy-ass british royals and I damn sure don't care if one of those buck tooth goons gets engaged! Fuck em!  Keep that news on british tv bro, we dont wanna see that over here.  American news outlets should stick to covering American royalty like the Karadashians and the Jersey Shore gang.

So what's in store for 2011???  I don't really know, but we are moving closer and closer to 2012 and that kinda makes me nervous.  We're entering into the end times and people need to start getting prepared.  Have a happy new year Plan "B" fans and I'll see you in 2011.  Plan "B" out!